Why Doesn’t Kingpin Get Its Due?

Kingpin did not make back its budget during its theatrical run. That fact astounds me. Dumb and Dumber, the film the Farrelly brothers directed before Kingpin, made $247 million on a budget of $17 million. There’s Something About Mary, the Farrelly joint following it, grossed $369 mil on $23 million. So why did Kingpin so widely miss the financial mark?

It certainly wasn’t due to quality, because Kingpin trounces Mary in head-to-head competition. (The competition’s sole criteria is “which film did I like more,” which is biased, but it’s my website, so those are the breaks.) And I would rank it every bit the equal of Dumb and Dumber, which people are quick to name an all-time comedy legend. Yet Kingpin never made the money, never had the glory and doesn’t get re-aired nearly enough for my liking.

The only theory I can come up with is that Kingpin, compared to its older and younger Farrely film siblings, lacked for star power. Dumb and Dumber was released right as Jim Carrey was blowing up like an American embassy in the Middle East. And people had been clamoring for more of Cameron Diaz’s skinny white bitch fuckability since The Mask. Who did Kingpin offer? I like Woody Harrelson as much as the next guy, but the man has the box office appeal of James Vanderbeek. And the less we say about this character, the better. Which leaves us with Bill Murray, who wasn’t actually Bill Murray until Lost in Translation was released seven years later, and Vanessa Angel, who brought with her the 46 viewers of Weird Science.

I’m not sure why I’m writing this article (just like you’re not sure why you’re reading it). My friends love Kingpin as much as I do. And it’s just a little too late to help the film’s box office. Maybe I wanted to do what I could to atone for my sins. You see, I’m part of the problem. I went to see Dumb and Dumber in the theater. And I went to see There’s Something About Mary there as well. But when it came to Kingpin, I waited. And waited. And, when I finally decided to go, it was too late.

Let’s be honest: You’re never going to be able to cure cancer, fix hunger in Africa or stop the NSA from archiving every picture of your genitals you’ve ever texted. But you can still make a difference in the world. You can purchase a copy of Kingpin today and force your friends to watch it with you. It’s never too late. Except for the starving kids in Africa. They’re boned. So very boned.