Tila Tequila Is Now Horrifically Racist — Papa’s Basement 493
We all remember Tila Tequila, right? She was famous in the mid-to-late 2000s for being a tiny Asian with huge, fake tits (it doesn’t take much to get ahead in […]
Doctors (specifically, a doctor named Dicken Ko, so ha) have performed the first American penis transplant. On the surface, this is great news. Thomas Manning, the peen-cipient, can live a normal life after losing his birthcock to cancer. Soldiers whose dicks blew up like a prank cigar in the face of IED shrapnel might be able to bone once again.
But the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. Mark my words, within 20 years, people are going to be 3d printing dick meat by the yard and having it grafted onto their shaft. It’s going to start a (baby) arms race that won’t be concluded until every man has a dong so big that no woman wants it and the world goes softly into that good night ala Children Of Men.
But it isn’t all dick this episode. Nope, because sticking with the theme of good intentions leading to unmitigated disaster, two idiots grabbed a baby bison at a national park and shoved it in their car because it looked cold. Did you get that? The 200 lbs fur-covered monster couldn’t handle 50 degree temperatures according to Robinson Crusoe and his dipshit wife. The outcome was somehow even worse than you can imagine. And I’ve been sent to collections by a company (incorrectly) and chronicle the fun that it’s been to resolve that thus far. Give a listen! Give a share! Tattoo the show’s logo over your own and send us the photo!
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