People love the Popeyes chicken sandwich. You know why? We are fat slobs that have no respect for our bodies, we want to be a part of anything we think is somehow exclusive while also costing us under $5, and we are all really cool with being Adolph Hitler to birds. Everyone has been posting crazy Popeyes chicken sandwich stories, like the footage of a woman smashing her car up to cut in a drive through line for one, but the DMV area is home to my favorite two debacles to come out of this delicacy’s release: A man getting stabbed because he cut in line for the sandwich, and one of the Popeyes in my backyard getting caught on tape assembling their sandwiches on top of a trash bin. God help me, I love it all.
On top of that, Eva and I talk Terminator: Dark Fate (which is currently eating shit at the box office harder than some creature from Greek myth that has its lips glued to its ass by Zeus for speaking lies), which cast member displays their unbelievably amazing ass multiple times in the film (it still might be Schwarzenegger, the man has been doing squats since 1884), and the horrific behavior of the people I sat next to in the theater (I wish they had cut a certain person in line at Popeyes).
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Eva “Thumbkin” Kriksciun – Twitter – @OrchardEva, Instagram – @OrchardEva
Mikael “Python Cock” Johnson – Twitter – @MikaelLJohn, Instagram – @MikaelLJohn
Joe “Bald” Gagliardi – Twitter – @JoeyDaEntataina, Instagram – @TheMightyJoeyG
John “Bald But For Propecia” Papageorgiou – Twitter – @PapasBasement, Instagram – @PapasBasement
Mike Sacks is a singularly gifted comedy writer, author of the indispensable humor tomes And Here’s the Kicker and Poking a Dead Frog. His tireless work ethnic eventually took him […]
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