Thank You, Jesus, for Making LeBron James Lose the NBA Finals
For those of you who pee sitting down, don’t follow basketball or simply haven’t heard, the Dallas Mavericks have won the NBA Championship. Which means the Miami Heat, and, more […]
Originally, I had planned to spend the day penning another entry in my Vegas Vacation series which, by now, is officially longer than The Stand. My designs were changed, however, by a conversation with two friends at work (Chris Lingebach and Othello Bouchareb, whose radio show can be heard on 106.7 The Fan every Saturday 8-10 pm, so be sure to check it out), where I mentioned in passing that I had eaten a Burger King California Whopper earlier that day. All previous topics were immediately dropped, and, after describing the burger, both stated they would purchase it, the one debate being to do it later that night or wait until the next day. I figured if the only two people I had mentioned the burger to were that interested in it, I might as well give it a proper writeup.
For those of you who don’t know, the California Whopper is a variant of Burger King’s signature sandwich that swaps the traditional mayonnaise, ketchup and onions for guacamole, bacon and a chipotle-ranch sauce. By my math, you’re exchanging two boring condiments for two good ones and a vegetable (or whatever the Hell onions count as) for a fatty meat, so right there you’re coming out ahead. The guacamole and bacon mixed very well with the beef, though the chipotle-ranch sauce seemed a little calorically excessive (which was obviously a large concern for a man who chased his sandwich down with several-hundred french fries and a gallon of Fanta), and it added little to the sandwich’s flavor.
No, as far as Burger King burgers go, the California Whopper is a serviceable addition to the menu, and you won’t be disappointed if you choose it. My only complaint (I’d say “beef,” but then I’d have to hang myself for the good of the nation) is that the entire time I was eating it, I kept thinking to myself, “This would taste 100 times better if it were made by someone like Five Guys or Z-Burger, whose ingredients aren’t so bland.” While it may be unfair to compare a Burger King product to something produced by a more expensive burger chain, the California Whopper clocks in at $4, which isn’t that much cheaper than a normal Five Guys burger. I’m going to conclude this celebration of my cheapness before I’m forced by law to end it with a YouTube video of me dropping a handful of change and counting it by ear, but just be warned that you might be better off ordering a few burgers off the dollar menu and mashing them together into some sort of burger Voltron. Bon appetit.
Butch on June 16, 2011
Unfortunately in my country we only have mcdonalds,kentucky and burger king.
And compared to those joints,the california whopper is about the best tasting burger available.