The Latest Song I Hate Myself for Loving

Everyone has songs they’re ashamed to admit they love. For example, I’m unable to turn the dial any time Ke$ha’s “Your Love is My Drug” comes on. Ke$ha’s a cow who can eat my ass for making me hit shift plus the “4” key every time I should be typing her name with a damn letter s, and singing along in your car to a chorus that contains “What you’ve got boy/Is hard to find/I think about it/All the time” makes you appear strictly dickly to your fellow commuters, but there’s no denying she pens a catchy tune. So it is the spirit of inane pop crap like “Your Love” that I introduce you to my latest earshame: “Super Bass” by Nicki Minaj.

Just when I thought my tastes couldn’t get more effeminate, here comes a video brimming over with more half-dressed, muscular black men than a slave auction. Nicki’s also managed to work some white pretty boys in there, affording the male viewer the luxury of questioning their sexuality both with and without interracial underpinnings. At least Miss Minaj has an incredible body that she doesn’t mind showing off nonstop to butch things up a little, though the parade of wigs gets old. How many horses are going through life with a bare ass because their tail is on Nicki’s head? I hope Mr. Owl can get to the bottom of that one for me, too.

Enjoy the song. Because you’re going to be singing it to yourself for the next week.