The Grammys Were Last Night
The Grammys are an irrelevant platform for old white people to tell other old white people what “hip” music they should be listening to. There was a time when that […]
Before last night, I was blissfully unaware of both Justin Vernon and his band, Bon Iver. Had you asked me what a “Bon Iver” was, I would have assumed some some sex act from the pages of Urban Dictionary involving feces, semen and the face of an unwilling female participant. Thanks to the Grammys, though, I now know that Justin Vernon is a man capable of saying the following when called on stage to accept the Best New Artist Grammy:
“When I started to make songs, I did it for the inherent reward of making songs, so I’m a little uncomfortable up here.”
Fuck. You. You know a foolproof way for making sure your precious songs never land you an award, asshole? Don’t release them. Don’t assemble a band and tour relentlessly to play them in front of as many people as possible. Don’t do interviews to promote them. Don’t try your hardest to look like every other hipster douche that I’d fling my urine on like some lifer if it wouldn’t get me arrested. In short, do the opposite of everything you’ve spent the last several years doing and we will all be better off for it. I haven’t been this enraged since I accidentally dropped my Krispy Skreme Jack-O-Lantern doughnut last October. Eight more months until I can right that wrong.
Rich on February 13, 2012
I like Bon Iver, so perhaps I’m not the right person to defend Justin Vernon, but just because the guy likes some of the accolades one gets with music, doesn’t mean they are comfortable with that kind of spotlight. Realize he did say “when I started to make songs”. That’s not to say that he hasn’t changed some since then.
Chris on February 14, 2012
I totally agree with you John. His music isn’t even that good.