Taco Bell is the LEGO of fast food: It has six different “bricks” – meat, cheese, tortillas, beans, taco shells and sour cream – which it regularly mashes into different combinations, then declares “Hey, we made a new product!” Usually, it’s a success. After all, those are pretty tasty bricks. […]
As an American patriot, I spend each Sunday on the couch like a cancer patient, watching 11 straight hours of NFL football. One of the interesting side effects of doing so is that the advertisements that air during football games (and there aren’t many, because NFL commercial time is prohibitively […]
That title read a little more euphemistically than I’d have preferred, but it got the job done. In case you thought that devouring a triumverate of Sonic’s Premium Beef Hot Dogs was the extent of my gluttony last week, I’m here to tell you that you’re tragically mistaken: I dabbled […]
I apologize for the title, which sounds like a line from Shylock’s “If you prick us, do we not bleed?” speech in The Merchant of Venice. An Alabama law firm is alleging that Taco Bell’s beef, well, doesn’t legally qualify as beef. (To be exact, they found it to contained […]
I’ve made no secret on this site of my love-hate relationship with fast food (hate the body it gives me, love every other aspect of it more than life itself). I do my best to avoid consuming it, enduring weeks of bombardment by ads for the latest burrito or burger, […]
There comes a time in every man’s life when, pushed too far by the tyranny of evil oppression, he must stand and fight back. Nat Turner knew it. David Lee Roth knew it. And, as I screamed “F*ck you, you fat f*cking c*nt!” at a man outside Taco Bell who […]
The older I get, the more I realize there is very little I do well in life. Fast food is one of those things, though. Whenever I see a friend post on Facebook about the latest fine eatery they just dined at, I simple laugh to myself, go to the […]