I Don’t Get Farmville. At All.

This article about a mother shaking her baby to death because he interrupted her during a Farmville session reminded me that I’ve never seen a game with a bigger gender divide. Well, scratch that, because most games feature a gender divide of “only guys play this,” but women go absolutely batshit for Farmville and I still can’t figure out why.


If you’ve never played the game, save your time, because it’s effing horrible. I got suckered into it by a few girls last year when I was killing time at work (WTOP‘s employee of the year, baby!) because I’d already watched everything free on Hulu and hadn’t taken the full plunge into sloth and coughed up the money for Netflix yet. The game is based around planting crops, harvesting crops and growing your farm. That’s it. You just plant, wait for days on end (and those are real days, not game time days), then harvest to earn the money for more seeds to plant. I’ve never seen a more inane game in my life. And because I barely played, each time I did log on, I was treated to the site of all my crops withered and dead on the vine. Given the fact I’m already a depressed underachiever, the last thing I needed to be presented with by a supposedly enjoyable game was a metaphor for my failure of a life.


So what is it, ladies? What in your brain is so damn stimulated by Farmville? Because if it’s a love of schedule and routine, I’d rather get AIDS and base my life around when I had to take my AZT than get my scheduling kicks from that stupid game.