Kate Upton is the Sports Illustrated 2012 Swimsuit Issue Cover Girl
Here to make the woman you spent your Valentine’s Day dollars on look like dog shit by comparison is Kate Upton, who will be on the cover of 2012’s Sports […]
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Why Valentine’s Day Sucks
In the pantheon of holidays, Valentine’s Day is at the bottom of my list. Not because I feel alone or unloved or any of those other emotions for women. It’s […]
Justin Vernon of Bon Iver Is a Massive Twat
Before last night, I was blissfully unaware of both Justin Vernon and his band, Bon Iver. Had you asked me what a “Bon Iver” was, I would have assumed some […]
The Grammys Were Last Night
The Grammys are an irrelevant platform for old white people to tell other old white people what “hip” music they should be listening to. There was a time when that […]
Whitney Houston Died
Whitney Houston died Saturday night. Though no official cause has been named yet, it was drugs. The sad thing about Whitney is that she spent the second half of her […]
Forgive the Lack of Updates
Sorry I didn’t upload much this week. It was time for my annual crippling sinus infection and I’ve spent Tuesday onward lying in my own snotty filth playing video games […]
Papa’s Basement 2-6-12-Win a Date With My Co-Host Veronica
There are scummy, cheating douche bags, and then there is the guy that two-timed my co-host, Veronica. Listen to the extent of his deception (and take notes if you’re looking […]
Alternative Options For the Super Bowl Halftime Show
I’d prefer a return to the days of Up with People to Madonna. At least they have comedic value. For a league that fields the finest sports product known to […]
Childhood Memories That Scarred Me For Life
To tell the truth, it isn’t the easiest job coming up up with good ideas for this site. Episodes of my radio show fill some of the gaps, and the […]
Papa’s Basement 1-30-12-Embarrassing TV Confessions
My new obsession with the BBC comedy Gavin & Stacey led me to a startling conclusion: I’ve watched a lot of sappy TV in my day. Share in the fun […]
My Secret Shame (Watch Gavin & Stacey This Weekend)
I tend to be a logical, keeps-his-cool kinda guy. Not to the degree of Mr. Spock, mind you, though I do view him as a role model for how all […]
Picking the Oscars With a Moron
Mine is a life of dichotomies. I log countless hours at the gym yet have a booth on reserve at the Great American Buffet. I love sex, yet panic after […]
Papa’s Basement 1-23-12-I Solve the Afterlife
In all of man’s time on this Earth, one of his biggest questions has been “What happens to me after death?” Well, question no longer. My co-host Veronica and I […]
The Michael Jackson Experience
I wonder how many skeeved-out emails it took before he clarified that The Michael Jackson Experience was a game and not a slang term for a light-skinned thumb being mashed […]
Click Here to Learn About SOPA and Protect IP
I didn’t write anything for Papa’s Basement today because Reddit, the site responsible for 90% of my traffic, shut its doors in protest of SOPA and Protect IP. What are […]