Reviewing Bully Without Having Seen It
One would assume that Bully offers a glimpse into the current “epidemic” of adolescent bullying. Not to sound like a dick, but I don’t get why bullying is the hot […]
The original Clash of the Titans was one of those oddball fantasy movies that, along with Krull and The Beastmaster, invariably managed to be on TBS any time I was up spending the night tripping balls on cough syrup as a teen. It featured laughable special effects and was recorded on such low-grade film stock that I assumed it was produced in the 60s, which was all part of its charm.
So I was understandably pissed when a “reboot” (suck my cock and just call it a remake, already) of Clash was released in 2010 that looked to have none of the original’s appeal. Sure enough, two years have passed, and Clash has come and gone like a fart in a stiff breeze. You know why? Because it was too pretty. It was polished and soulless. There isn’t a single moment that compares to this scene from the original. How amazingly trippy is that?! It makes me want to inject heroin into my eyeballs and insert a narcotic suppository the size of a Chipotle burrito for old time’s sake. Oh, and Wrath of the Titans will somehow be even worse than the Clash remake. There, boom, movie review.
Matt on April 1, 2012
I remember watching the old Clash of the Titans and Jason and the Argonauts all the time with my grandmother.
Dimley on April 1, 2012
Is there a The Three Stooges review on the way?