I’m not a believer in any sort of afterlife. I think you die and you rot (happy Monday!). Still, the thought of one day being nothingness terrifies the f out of me, so I throw it out there that, maybe, in the future, our brains will be uploaded to some […]
If you think watching The Three Stooges looks like a good idea this weekend, here are some other activities I think you might enjoy giving a try: Drink lead paint smoothies. Get shot in the testicles by Robocop. Huff some jenkem. Visit one of these. Those were just suggestions. Really, […]
(Note: This one time, you shouldn’t lend too much credence to what I say, because, according to Rotten Tomatoes, Cabin is apparently the Citizen fucking Kane of slasher films. At least according to its score on Rotten Tomatoes. I still won’t watch it, though.) I’ve never understood horror as a […]
Once in a while, you hear a piece of news that hits you in the solar plexus like an angry drill sergeant. I was on a bit of a high today because I started the morning off making $96 dollars for picking a lock and cutting a few keys (I […]
It was announced today that the teen birth rate in the U.S. has hit its lowest levels in the seven decades since the statistic started being tracked. Experts credit this to an increase in teens either using contraception or abstaining from sex altogether, but I bet the truth is it’s […]
Last night’s episode of Mad Men (click here to watch it via Amazon) featured yet another scene that will have everyone talking today. No, I’m not talking Christina Hendricks in her black bra, the strap of which looked like it was under more strain than that wire that catches jets […]
Comic books suck. I’m sorry, but they do. Nothing ever happens in them and, if anything did, it was 40 years ago and nothing has happened since. There is one awesome thing about comics, though: Female super heroes. Hear us discuss the most fuckable of the bunch…along with a few […]
Time has not been kind to the American Pie series. The original trilogy seems largely forgotten, and there have been dozens of horrible, straight-to-video releases that feature only Eugene Levy and his eyebrows from the first three movies. So I really don’t know why a decision was made to go […]
This post has a misleading title, because I’ve seen Titanic before (though it was the normal version and not this tarted-up 3D affair). I remember hating it until, as they say in the movie industry, “Shit went down, son,” at which point I laughed myself hoarse watching a bunch of […]
